Where Are The Princes?

So we took our family to see “Tangled,” the new Disney animated princess movie. Thankfully my children have advanced past the throw popcorn, fidget when they’re bored in a movie stage—my husband has not. Middle aged and he still acts middle school—I came home with popcorn in my bra. So I’m very aware of the fact that men and women are fundamentally different, but I don’t think that our fairy tales need to change just because it’s easier for women to be the adult.


We laughed as an animated princess saved her prince from multiple tight squeezes, coaxed him into remembering his dream, and trudged her way toward her dream even if she had to pull the prince along behind her. But it made me a little sad. I know that I’m a capable woman and I can, and do make dinner in high heels, help with homework while working on a spreadsheet, get everyone to school and bed on time and remember to show my husband some womanly attention even if I’m dead dog tired. If I felt so inclined I could manage my life and my family life single handedly while my husband flipped channels in his recliner—no assistance necessary. But, here’s the thing, men need to take care of the women in their lives. If they didn’t have that responsibility they could easily cross to the dark side where selfishness mingles with endless hours of online gaming. And we need to be taken care of because women tend to take care of everyone else.

I’m raising two sons into what I hope will be two good young men and I make them crazy by forcing them to hold the door open for the old woman shuffling into the grocery store with her walker. I also remind them that it’s not okay to hit girls—even if their sister wrote her name all over his homework (she’s just learning and so she writes her name everywhere!) I make them get me a drink when I’m thirsty and clear my dishes from the table. They perform all these duties with an obvious roll of the eye, but I want them to be actual princes to their future wives.

I’m a strong woman and I want my daughter to be strong, but I don’t want her to confuse the ability to handle everything with the need to do it all. I’m all for a modern princess as long as the prince remains chivalrous. That’s the thing about happily ever after—it works best when two people are working for it rather than just one.